Suggestions

  

From Graham – a close friend to Roger

It’s only from space the full extent of Earth’s environmental damage can be observed. Deforestation, receding glaciers, coastal inundation and the advance of deserts. From the flattened horizon of a human perspective, few witness the blanching of a coral reef or a river choked with plastic. The devastation remains somehow abstract… deniable.

It’s difficult to deny global weather patterns are becoming more anomalous and extreme. Or refute data that tells of rising average temperatures and collapsing biodiversity.

Venus, our nearest planet, suffered the fate of runaway atmospheric heating about 1 billion years ago when she still had surface temperatures akin to earth. This calamitous build-up of greenhouse gasses created a roiling inferno. A tormented celestial augur perhaps, foreshadowing the fate of her sister planet?

Just as our Earth’s marring is only framed in the bigger picture, the solution too, must be holistic. Political elites must be pressured to think pro-action over procrastination. Corporations must prioritise preservation over profit. And even wealthy religious organisations might be encouraged to save the planet rather than souls? They could even get real and recognise that their impending Judgment Day-cum-Apocalypse will likely be man-made rather than deity-designed. Surely this is the true existential crisis and moral imperative for all to confront…?

The onus is also on individuals to be the change through the choices they make. Small personal sacrifices for the greater good of our, and future generations. The cumulative benefits of driving a vehicle less, eating less (or no) meat and dairy, and conscientious consumerism should not be underestimated. The individual is not powerless to affect change by boycotting businesses that despoil natural habitat or cruelly exploit our fellow animals. Or to see beyond that acquisitional mindset fuelled by sly advertising.

Oh, but of course, there’ll always be climate change deniers - last seen at a Flat Earth Society meeting alongside creationist preachers and conversion therapists…

Roger loved this sun-kissed cradle of life we call Earth, Gaia, Terre... ‘Earth Mother’ features widely in his nature poems and was his foremost muse. He was captivated by her kaleidoscopic raiment in the ebb and flow of seasons. He took practical steps to conserve our precious planet too. He was ostensibly vegan and passionate about recycling – to the extent of policing rubbish bins where he lived. He’d leave curt notes in communal areas for offending parties who dumped non-recylcables in the green bin. And, believe me, Roger knew how to lambast even the most shameless slattern or slob!

When Rog was more mobile we enjoyed many a stroll on Hampstead Heath; communing with mother nature, imbibing ambrosial scents of wild, iridescent flora and savouring heavenly birdsong. Sometimes (pre-vegan days) we’d enjoy an ice cream and trace meandering lakeside tracks among coruscating sunbeams. We’d invariably climb Parliament Hill and gaze down on London’s sprawling cityscape then dive into a cosy pub. The Heath was Roger’s sanctuary and connection to his beloved Earth Mother.

This next poem of Roger’s appears in Accomplices To Illusion, 2007. I find it provocative.

‘The fact is that no species has ever had such wholesale control over everything on earth, living or dead, as we now have. That lays upon us, whether we like it or not, an awesome responsibility. In our hands now lies not only our own future, but that of all other living creatures with whom we share the earth.’ David Attenborough

‘Anyone who believes in indefinite growth on a physically finite planet is either mad or an economist’ David Attenborough

 

*  *  *

 

SUGGESTIONS

 

They suggest we try and save garden creatures
and ocean whales before it’s too late

They suggest our luxury choices are sure to leave
the generation of 3000 with none

They suggest parents are scared of their children
and raising monsters

They suggest religious leaders pay more attention
to compassion than division

They suggest politicians aren’t listening to those
who put them there

They suggest our multicultural societies are failing
themselves and each other

They suggest we start learning the lessons wars
should have taught us

They suggest we’re but living will and testament
of a dying planet

So who are they, daring to suggest humankind look
to its shortcomings?

Among leafy choirs, anxious waves, nature rehearses
this world’s passing

 

Copyright R. N. Taber 2008
[Note: Revised (2008) from the original poem as it appears in Accomplices To Illusion, 2007.]

Hope is a Woman

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Every so often readers ask me for a CD recording of my informal poetry reading on the 4^th plinth in Trafalgar Square back in July 2009 as my contribution to Antony Gormley’s One and Other ‘live sculpture’ project.  Sky Arts typically refused to oblige those of us who participated with a CD so I can only repeat the link for anyone interested. [The entire web stream - all 2400 hours of it - is now archived in the British Library.]

Be warned, though. The entire clip lasts an hour:

http://www.webarchive.org.uk/wayback/archive/20100223121732/oneandother.co.uk/participants/Roger_T  [NB: Sept 19, 2019 - The British Library confirmed today that he video is no longer available as it was incompatible with a new IT system, However, it still exists and BL hope to reinstate it and make it available to the public again at some future date.] RNT

Meanwhile…

The vanity of human beings is such that we like to think we are in control of our lives and nature has to play second fiddle to our intentions as well as in our affections.

I wonder about that sometimes…

Some people look to God as the ultimate male ego. The Ancient Greeks cherished Elpis, Spirit of Hope. Me, I prefer to look to Earth Mother for an inner strength of a quality that can only be female; therein, I suspect, lies the key to humankind's survival.  Ah, but on whose terms, ours? Don't count on it...especially if unless countries around the world fail to treat nature with more respect and DO something about climate change; the latter affects us all, of course, homing in fast on a common humanity...gay, straight, transgender... no one spared, from all walks of life. We all need to get real and work together... treat Earth Mother more kindly and trust Hope to work its evergreen magic.

(Photo: Elpis, Spirit of Hope (copied from the web)

HOPE IS A WOMAN

To Mother Nature
we bared all as we were born;

since then, for good or ill,

(mostly) in good faith her colours
openly worn

Green, the grass,
 defying threats of acid rain; 

Blue, clear skies turning

a blind eye to the human obsession

with temporal gain

Red, streaks of blood
across a sky, the throat of a fox

as the first hound’s claw 

finds its mark, and darkness shuts us
at random in its box

Yellow, the sun’s wounds

weeping through drought, famine,

and an outing of inhumanity,

in platitudes among record audiences
for prime television

Stumps, where we'd stood,

listening to a pretty wood, if deaf 

to every plea it made
and warning it gave, now all but dead
but for its grief

Grey, tear-stained profiles
among remains of a next generation
running scared in the face

of apathy from elders shooting selfies

before they were born

To Earth Mother dare we fall
on our knees, if only to beg Her stay
this enemy's execution,

given that any 'tomorrow is another day'
well past its use-by date

Copyright R N. Taber 2007

[Note: An earlier version of this poems appears in  Accomplices To Illusion by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2007]

Being Me

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Today's piece is a relatively early poem, rediscovered some time ago and only slightly but significantly revised.

Now, for anyone growing up in an intrinsically homophobic environment as I did, being gay can send self-esteem over a cliff. My closet was an abyss where I hung suspended for years.

Growing up, though, brings with it an appreciation of what’s wrong with our world and how we can change it for the better. We can choose to try, each in our own big or small way, or settle for how things are…

BEING ME

I was never any good at school,

my schooldays were a sham,

I’d mess around and play the fool

because I couldn’t quite get to grips

with who I am

I had a working class education,

didn’t ever dare aim high,

couldn’t see the point of ambition,

so I’d mess around and play the fool,

content to live a lie

I had a real problem with identity,

couldn’t bear anyone to know

it was an awakening homosexuality

saw me mess around and play the fool,

put on a side-show

I’d have sex in sly, secret, places,

even fancy guys in the street,

jerk open their shut-down faces,

let, dark, penetrative looks grind me 

to dust at their feet

There came a time as I grew older,

I wearied of playing the ham,

and resolved to get real, be bolder,

look the world in the eye and dare it

deny me for who I am

I came out to just about everyone,

and it was scary, but, oh, so cool

to be free at last of secrets, have fun,

walk tall, no more putting myself down 

for a self-conscious fool

I was never any good at school,

my early years were a sham,

but if I sometimes play the fool,

it’s because I’m not just gay but human,

and happy to be who I am

Copyright R. N. Taber 1985; 2014

A Fighting Spirit

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Some of you may have read how a father here in the UK recently hanged himself just eighteen months after his son took his own life following rumours about his sexuality. Following his son's death, he began an anti-homophobic-bullying campaign, winning an award from the charity Stonewall for his efforts. It would appear, however, that he was finally overcome by grief.

Two lives lost because homophobia is alive and kicking.

Homophobic bullying (indeed, bullying of any kind) is always hard to deal with, yet deal with it we must, but not alone. Half the battle is telling someone what is happening and fighting the bullies together. There can be no worse feeling than being bullied and trying, but failing, to handle it alone; feelings of humiliation, anger and fear are bad enough, but even worse is an appalling sense of helplessness and loneliness.

As I have said before on the blogs, asking for help is not a sign of weakness; on the contrary is a demonstration of maturity.

It is rarely easy to develop a fighting spirit when, at heart, we are peace loving individuals, but life often demands of us that we do just that. Openly gay men and women will always be vulnerable to the less enlightened among the heterosexual majority; a fighting spirit is not only necessary for our survival, but also shows the bullies and homophobes that we can play mind games too. There is a lot to be said for beating an enemy at his or her own game.

So if any readers are being bullied, DO confide in someone and get help. You are also welcome to let off steam by contacting me any time at rogertab@aol.com with 'Blog Reader' in the subject field.
Talking and/or writing through our thoughts invariably helps clarify them and go a long way towards restoring our self-confidence; in this case,  confidence in our sexual identity to the extent we can even begin to see a glimmer of light at the end of what may well seem a long, dark tunnel.

Did I say it was easy?

A FIGHTING SPIRIT 

Once I hid my true self away
because I’m gay,
frightened to run the gamut
of what people might say,
raised to believe I should be
ashamed, that folks
would see in me someone
to despise. It took me
years to realize they are wrong
who fail to understand
that sexuality has to be genetic
or how else to explain
so many gay men and women
the world over?

I got angry about taking cover
from what some people (still) have to say
about being gay

Now I show my true self openly
because I’m proud
of who I am and an integral
part of that is being gay;
I’ll not hide my true self away,
will run the gamut
of what people might say
(if I must) preferring
to trust in a common humanity
than voices calling
from shadows, goading us
to bigotry in the name
of this or that religion or culture
the world over

I grew weary of taking cover
from what some people (still) have to say
about being gay

Yes, some people will look at me
and gossip
about my sexuality, say
gay people should be more discreet,
in spite of so-called equality
and Human Rights
because it isn’t fair on those who
continue to insist
it is a crime against nature or sin
against religion
for men to make love with men
or women with women
though love fight its way through
the politics of division

[From: On The Battlefields Of Love by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2010]

Time for a Reality Check?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Coming out to family and friends can be a traumatic experience even these days, worse when they don’t take the news too well. Give them time to get used to the idea, yeah? It can come as a shock to those who haven’t already guessed. Moreover, many people feel genuinely hurt that we haven’t confided in them sooner. Hurt can easily express itself in anger, an anger that many gay people are inclined to interpret as rejection. Sometimes, yes, they reject us for our sexuality and we have to try and win them round. In the early days, though, it may well be that they are angry with themselves for our not feeling we could trust them.

‘Win them over?’ I hear some of you protest. Well, yes. People who don’t grow up in a gay-friendly environment will often need time to put everything (usually bad) they have been told about gay men and women to one side and, hopefully, put love and friendship first. This may well put them at odds with their own family, friends, religion...whatever. So give them time to get their heads around it all, yeah?

Bear in mind it could just as easily be you wearing blinkers, yeah?

Many people are ok about homosexuality and same sex relationships these days, at least here in the West... but by no means everyone. As for gay people living in the southern hemisphere, their families and friends may well have been brainwashed by bigoted religious leaders or socio-cultural traditions...whatever, to think the worst of us. Love and friendship may well overcome prejudices that run deep...but not always. It is hardly surprising that so many gay people in Africa, India, the Middle East, China etc. remain closet all their lives. It is a tragedy that cannot be overstated.

The fact that many gay people and those who seek to be reconciled with transgender needs are denied the opportunity to live openly with their sexual identity has to be one of the modern world’s greater tragedies. So much for a progressive 21st century! We can but hope humanity will quicken its step and see to it that there is real progress world-wide in due course.

TIME FOR A REALITY CHECK?

I shed tears on my pillow most nights,
despairing of a homespun mentality
closing its eyes to how Human Rights
might extend to a person’s sexuality

A time came when I had to speak out,
tell the world not only that I am gay
but would not, for that, be put to rout
by cruel words ever chasing easy prey

See how cruelty borrows a human face
the easier to feed on an inhumanity
that respects neither person nor place
while binding its acolytes to apostasy

I felt so alone, nothing but dead ends
whatever conventional path I took,
no support from my family or friends,
life reading like a badly written book

I even took God (very) soundly to task
for providing no answers I sought;
then a voice in my head suggested I ask
what family and friends really thought

We hadn’t really talked anything through,
(I saw everyone as a potential enemy);
it now became obvious what I should do,
whatever people might think about me

Truth is stranger than fiction, people say,
and I had woven fictions around me;
True, some folks will despise anyone gay,
but blinkers off, the more clearly we see

Life rarely (if ever) resembles a fairy tale
or bedtime story (precursor to sleep)
but better drink from than fall into a well,
wake to promises fantasy can never keep

Copyright R N Taber 2010 (Rev. 2018)

[Note: An earlier version of this poem appears under the title 'Caught Out Wearing Blinkers' in On the Battlefields Of Love by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2010]