Mind-Body-Spirit, Renaissance

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Today’s post was written in 1998, and is based on events that took place many years ago. 

Now, it has always been one of life's greater tragedies that just about anyone can be subjected to bullying by ignorant cowards who have no respect for their victim’s sex, sexuality, ethnicity, creed or even age.

Although bullying went on in schools even when I was young, there is no escape from it these days as the bullies taunt their victims on their mobile phones and social media sites. Some children and young people have even been known to commit suicide as a result of being bullied, adults too.

Parent and schools must spare no one’s sensitivity, but make their children confront the awful circumstances of bullying.

As for the bullies themselves, plainly they have psychological problems and need help to overcome them, but that does not mean we should go softly, softly with them; exposing them for who they are and condemning their actions unreservedly would be a good start. For far too long, various School Heads and parents have been in denial about bullying taking place under their very noses.  

Bullies may be in a minority among children and young people, but it is a very significant minority that needs to be tackled before they carry their sick ways into adulthood.

Now, we all have our own ideas about 'Heaven' but  is it not the Here-and-Now that matters most and making that as comparable as we can with whatever concept we might cherish regarding what may come later? No bullying culture - at school in the workplace or wherever - should be tolerated and needs must be nipped in the bud or else the young bully may well grow up to be an older bully. 

Anyone being bullied should find the courage to seek help and support. there is no shame in that, any shame rests with the bully. 

The worst punishment for any bully is public exposure for being just that, a bully. 

MIND-BODY-SPIRIT, RENAISSANCE

Local park, lonely tree,

child looks up in a bloody pool

who should be at school

Tall, grown old,

branches outflung

at a brave new world;

small and sad, kid in uniform

hugs a photograph

before taking a penknife

to scratch out a life

on rough bark. Tree submits.

Hanging skylark lets out a cry

as chick-in-the-nest

prepares to fly

Climb, climb!

Terra out of mind.

bullies down our way, chaff

on the wind …

Tears for mum and dad and pal

heffalump.

Gran and grandpa, show ‘em all,

not afraid to jump.

A still, small voice 
whispering in the ear,

‘Look! Beyond that runny nose

there has to be
a way clear to confide bully fear 
in someone near

and (who knows?) eventually

make it disappear.’

And it did, I know.

That kid at the Hanging Tree

long ago, but walked away

free...was me

Copyright R. N. Taber 2001; 2010

[Note: An earlier version of this poem (written in 1998) appears under the title 'Heaven Can Wait, in Love And Human Remains by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2000.]

LGBT, Winning the Argument

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Our parents may well want the best things in life for us, but when it comes to sexual identity, relatively few have a clue. It is down to us to show them where their perspective on the whole gay ethic is sadly flawed.

Society may well see itself as our mentor, and its schools the tools of this mentorship, but there are times when the student needs to educate the teacher and the teacher needs to shut up long enough to listen...

LGBT, WINNING THE ARGUMENT

"You can’t live your life being gay,"

- my parents said to me;

they meant well, could but struggle

with my sexuality;

"What will people think, say, even do?"

- my parents said to me,

it might ruin my career prospects,

couldn’t I see?

"Besides, what will the neighbours say

- or the rest of the family?

Shake off this gay stuff and get real,

stick with normality."

Ah, but this ‘gay stuff’ is a part of me,

- who I am and proud to be;

I stood my ground, pleaded the case

for an honest equality

Not everyone took my part, I must say

- but folks who matter to me

(and to whom I matter too) agree

we're born free to live our lives
as best we can, heartbeat of any society.

- to ourselves and others be true,

and if 'gay stuff' a part of who we are,

it deserves love’s blessing too

Copyright R. N. Taber 2010, 2019

[Note; An earlier version of this poem appears under the title 'Gay Stuff' in On the Battlefields of Love by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2010]

Extracts from a (Gay) Schoolboy's Diary

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

It has always been and still is absurd to suggest there are no gay boys and girls awakening to their sexuality besides all the other teenage angst.

This poem was written in 1970, three years after homosexual relationships ‘in private, and between consenting adults’ were decriminalised here in the UK. I looked back then with a mixture or pain and pleasure. 40+ years on, I have much the same feelings. Yes, it was tough having to live a lie. [That is why I sympathise so with those who still do, for whatever reasons.] Yet, there was a strong sense of camaraderie among gay men in those long-ago days that gave me a powerful and much needed sense of belonging; it often seems to me that much of that is missing now. It was easier to talk to other gay men and make friends, whether it led to sex or not. No one assumed that striking up a conversation was necessarily a chat-up strategy.

I used to think it was just a generation gap thing, but a young blog reader (still at school) confided only recently that he wished more gay guys would see him and want to get to know him as a person, not just for sex. Mind you, he was talking about the Gay Scene I felt I should point out that it’s what the Gay Scene is all about...sex. There are still some great friendly gay bars and social groups where you can make friends and, well...who knows? In the old days, there were no gay social groups but the bars were easier to find because there were  so few of them.

Seek (try the Internet) and ye shall find. Just be careful out there, though, yeah? Oh, and always trust you better instincts. Now, you like someone and they seem to like you? They invite you back to their place for the proverbial coffee but your head is saying one thing even while your nether regions are crying out for something else? Ah, well, in that case, it’s usually wiser if not safer to go home and jerk off instead. [Some things never change...]

EXTRACTS FROM A (GAY) SCHOOLBOY’S DIARY

All I asked was for love
to take me into its care,
keep me safe from the bigotry
I was finding everywhere;
little did I know of the ways
of love or how it likes to play
hide-and-seek or the false trails
it invariably lays

Desire, it played its part
and led me by the hand
to a secret place, hidden world
sanctuary for the damned;
I met up with other gay men
sharing all I’d imagined
for years, through tell-tale tears
on the stains in my bed

I discovered I was not evil
as defined by convention,
religion or morality as requiring
parental instruction;
I learned to recognise how
the crook of one finger
or a light in lowered eyes meant
come closer, closer...

So it was, my youth was a lie
a potpourri of self-denial
for meaningless sex acts in secret
that made me a criminal;
Yet, far more than cheap thrills
and passing balls, this journey
into sexuality showed me who I am
and was born to be

Came a day I didn’t need to lie
even saw convention bend
its rules, move on to kinder times,
some of that kindness spent
on gay people who want to be
free to live and love as they will
without others passing judgement
and moving in for the kill

Oh, but if kindness were all it takes
to make bigotry slam on its brakes!

Copyright R. N. Taber 1970; 2009