A Conspiracy of Faith OR Gay in Iran

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

While our hearts go out to the victims and survivors of the recent earthquake in Iran, let’s not lose sight of the fact that it is a very repressive regime. Gay people have been executed in Iran for their sexuality alone. There is still a long way to go before we are accepted for ourselves worldwide and everyone recognizes we have as valuable a contribution to make to society as anyone among the heterosexual majority.

I wrote today’s poem after a conversation with two Iranian students in a gay bar here in London. 

Tehran: Photo from the Internet

This poem is a villanelle.

A CONSPIRACY OF FAITH or GAY IN IRAN

We suffer so, my love and me,
never free from persecution
for our ‘sin’ of homosexuality

We flung a bottle in a friendly sea
taking news of revolution...
We suffer so, my love and me!

Prey to a subterranean bigotry
killing us with religion
for our ‘sin’ of homosexuality

Tortured exiles in a home country
blind to natural evolution...
We suffer so, my love and me!

Openly engaging with society,
an impossible proposition
for our ‘sin’ of homosexuality

Condemned by an ancient judiciary
(a bond slave to tradition);
We suffer so, my love and me, 
for our ‘sin’ of homosexuality
  
London, August 2012

Copyright R N. Taber 2012

Gay Folks Do

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Yes, I know I am on a summer break...BUT...I would like to encourage readers to click on to the link below as I think it is very important for everyone in societies worldwide that this absurd notion about gay people needing to be ‘cured’ is killed off once and for all.

http://www.allout.org/en/actions/endgaycures?akid=809.914447.qwwDrp&amp=&amp=&amp=&rd=1&t=3&utm_campaign=endgaycures&utm_content=english&utm_medium=email&utm_source=actionkit

Sexuality has to be in the genes. How else can there be millions of us worldwide from all kinds of socio-cultural-religious backgrounds?  The less enlightened among the heterosexual majority need to change the record and get real.

Meanwhile...

A reader, 'Anton'  has asked me to repeat the link (again) to my informal poetry reading on the 4th plinth in  Trafalgar Square in 2009 as part of Antony Gormley's  One and Other 'live sculpture' project. Be warned, it lasts an hour:

http://www.webarchive.org.uk/wayback/archive/20100223121732/oneandother.co.uk/participants/Roger_T

Meanwhile...

Creative writing or any kind of creativity for that matter is a wonderful therapy. Don’t worry about being any good at it or not, just focus and go ahead; it is always a worthwhile exercise.

Now, I am not having as relaxing a break as I would like and am experiencing a lot of unexpected stress. As always, writing poems - especially love poems - helps relieve that stress and I would like to share this one with you today.

GAY FOLKS DO

There is a fire in me

that burns night and day,

but they say

it can’t possibly be love

because we’re gay

and everybody knows

gay folks

don’t do love, only camp,

butch and sex

There is a light in me

that shines night and day

but they say

it can’t have anything to do

with spirituality

since everybody knows

gay folks

only have time for sexual

identity

There is a voice in me

that sings night and day

about life, love,

and the sheer beauty

of being gay,

loving someone who loves

me too,

Earth Mother watching

over us

Copyright R. N. Taber 2012

Love's Take On Multiculturalism

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

I received the oddest email yesterday. A reader had some kind words for my poems but asks, ‘What is the point unless you can be counted among the great poets?’

This reader has answered his or her own question.  There is every point in writing poems if even just one person enjoys reading them.

So I am not a ‘great’ poet.  Do I care?  It is more than enough for me that both poetry blogs are read dail worldwide.

Too many cultures persist with a taboo on mixed-culture relationships. This is especially hard on those people, especially young people, living in a modern multicultural society.  Love has no time for such taboos and only asks that we respect its global identity.

It is no betrayal of culture, family or whatever to fall in love. Love brings shame on no one, and I include gay relationships. Those who see it as some kind of shameful betrayal are not only out of step with love, but out of step with their own culture for interpreting it by book rather than by heart; parents and other family members need to remind themselves that where any cultural responsibilities appear to override their love for children and siblings, the potential for shame lies not within that culture but within themselves. 

It is down and up to younger generations to break down old taboos once and for all, and as I look around me I can definitely see light at the end of that particular tunnel, but it is a long tunnel and long way to go yet before everyone gets to enjoy the sunshine; nor is there any need for compromise, just a common understanding of what drives the human spirit.

As I have said before and almost certainly will again, our differences do not make us different, only human, and we are all part of that global consciousness that comprises a common humanity; we need to respect each other's differences, not malign them.

LOVE’S TAKE ON MULTICULTURALISM 

As I put my lips to yours
they part to let my flame enter you,
its heat moulding us
into a live love-sculpture portraying
the true meaning of life

As the flame goes to work
on firing a peace offering to all those
who reject our love,
the raw scars of suffering peel away
like layers of an onion

As we dive and swim freely
where waters of the womb have risen
to offer us sanctuary
from wildfires threatening extinction,
we head for infinity

We reach a sandy shore,
our healing selves embraced by palms
whose leaves caress
where cruel hands would not long since 
have denied us a hearth

Oh, heaven, this splendid place;
if a dream, as real and far more likely 
to inspire angel choirs
than conflict among opposite numbers
in temporal divisions

Sadly, we must rise and leave
to make our way in this 'modern' world,
still a slave to its past
for all its fine rhetoric about fair play
in a free society

Yet, we have found a place
where no socio-cultural-religious spite
can keep us apart
though it snatch us up and spit us out
for breaking its rules

Find us among arts and streets,
recreating love’s custom-made models,
nor a finer take on life
than sex, sexuality, ethnicity or creed
reworking its humanity

Copyright R. N. Taber 2012

Pride and Joy, the Zen of Sexuality

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

This villanelle was written for a young reader who says he is in his teens and feels ‘so guilty’ because he finds  ‘...intense spirituality as well as physical enjoyment in gay sex’ while his parents ‘continue to express disgust and want me to see a psychiatrist.’ At least the guy is ‘out’ to his family, and that is half the battle won already. As he becomes  more self-confident in his sexuality, hopefully his parents will learn to have more confidence in him as a gay person and in themselves as the parents of a gay son.

Sometimes we need to give ourselves time to adapt to and/or work at improving certain situations and/or relationships; we should not begrudge others the same.

Many of my poems are variations on the same theme, but as my late mother used to say, if something is worth saying it is always worth repeating.

I can only hope my positive take on sexuality encourages anyone made to feel guilty and ashamed by the less enlightened among the heterosexual majority, including some parents and siblings, to shrug off that particular yoke.

Sexuality is part of who we are, and we should never feel ashamed of that, but accept it for what it is, a way to access the wholeness of our being including, for many if not most of us,  a spiritual dimension that doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with religion.

Enjoy!

PRIDE AND JOY, THE ZEN OF SEXUALITY

Oh, joy! In touch with sexuality,

(gay, lesbian, straight or transgender)

confirming a unique spirituality

Religion never had a monopoly

on the spiritual side of human nature.

Oh, joy! In touch with sexuality

Acknowledging our sexual identity

Inspires selfhood’s greater endeavour,

confirming a unique spirituality

Where truth declares itself openly,

bigotry’s acolytes vainly run for cover.

Oh, joy! In touch with sexuality

No finer anatomy of individuality

than its inner eye on integrity’s mirror,

confirming a unique spirituality

If love inspires a common humanity,

peace but asks we respect one another.

Oh, joy! In touch with sexuality,

confirming a unique spirituality

Copyright R. N. Taber 2012

Finding Out About Coffee

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Many thanks to a reader in Canada who has been in touch to say she enjoyed Predisposed To Murder as serialised on my fiction blog:

http://rogertaberfiction.blogspot.com. [It is irritating that sometimes the font keeps changing. I have asked Google for the reason, but have heard nothing back and they have done nothing about it. Please, also, bear with any typos etc as I have no one to proof my books and it is not easy having to do it oneself; the writer is too close to it and inclined to read how it should read rather than how it does.]

Now, positive feedback is always welcome although I have to say that any constructive feedback is very helpful whether in praise of something I have written or otherwise.

So...

Many thanks to readers who have been in touch to say they enjoy the videos on my You Tube. Everyone has understandably commented on how the inevitable background noise that comes with filming outdoors obscures my reading of a poem. Sorry about that, folks, but I only have a cheap camcorder. My close friend (and cameraman) Graham and I thought filming ‘on location’ would be more interesting for viewers than just having me read a poem sitting indoors or in the garden.  Since our early efforts, I have acquired a digital Dictaphone and am mow able to record over videos.  I won’t disappear from the camera altogether, but this is likely to be the way of things in future.  In the meantime, we are not trying to impress the BBC (or anyone else) so we hope you will enjoy our efforts without taking us too seriously:

http://www.youtube.com/rogerNtaber

Readers keep asking for a CD recording of my informal poetry reading on the 4^th plinth in London’s Trafalgar square back in 2009 that includes poems on a gay theme among others. Unfortunately, Sky Arts would not play ball on that one so I’m afraid you will just have to make a note of the link:

http://www.webarchive.org.uk/wayback/archive/20100223121732/oneandother.co.uk/participants/Roger_T [Sorry, this link does not always work now but I am looking into it.] RT Nov 2016

Some readers have also asked whether or not I have a Facebook account. Sorry, no. I have too many reservations about Facebook, especially since being victim of ID fraud some time ago for which I suspect my details on Facebook were responsible.

Meanwhile...

The school holidays will soon be here and many colleges and universities have already gone down for the summer vacation. I dare say many young gay men and women will be finding out about coffee (of the proverbial kind...) as I did so many, many, years ago.

FINDING OUT ABOUT COFFEE

When I first realized I am gay

I hadn’t a clue what to do or say,

even where to start satisfying

this gnawing hunger in my heart

If telling family and friends

was hard enough, then I thought

the worst part must be over

(hadn’t I finally blown my cover?)

But after being attracted to men

for about as long as I could recall,

it was time to consider seriously

how they may be attracted to me

I went on the Gay Scene but felt

out of place, very uncomfortable

with chat-ups and conversation

about likes, size, and group action

Self-esteem hitting rock bottom,

I went to a straight bar, met a guy

from school (a real good-looker)

and we played a game of snooker

I won the game, a flagging faith

in myself restored, feeling relaxed

and confident enough to agree

to go back to his place for a coffee

Feeling brave, I told him I’m gay

(the expression on his face said it all);

everything we’d left unsaid

led us safely, sensually, to his bed

He was very patient, taught me

how to enjoy making love as I do now,

letting sex come into its own,

mutual rapport expressed in passion

Copyright R. N. Taber 2008

PS  Be sure to have fun, and play safe...

Wishing you love and peace always,

Roger x

In the Swim, Whatever

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

We are each and every one of us in the swim of life; some are strong swimmers while the rest of us can barely keep our heads above water.

Whoever and wherever, we can but strive towards a shore that is sometimes distant, sometimes agonisingly close but always inspiring shoreline where dreams and best intentions beg our attention.

Life is a fast flowing river of good times and bad for everyone, although I suspect most if not all we LGBT folks endure more than our fair share of the latter. We can but swim  on and hope to arrive at some fair shore that will welcome us, and there are many.

I well recall once telling my mother she had a wonderful sense of humour to which she replied, with a wry smile, how we'd all be much the poorer without one. (A wise woman, my mother, dead some 40 years now but always in my head and heart.)

IN THE SWIM, WHATEVER

I grow old and, yes, the bottoms

of my trousers are rolled,

treading water in a vast sea, afraid

to swim, let a heat mist

swallow me up, let roaring shores

disappear since no respite there

for a troubled mind, but crowds

oblivious to my missing you,

Apollo’s kisses on me like darts

inflicting the bloody poetry

of pain, though waves wash it clean

so no one sees, no one reads

but upon whom it outs and feeds

I grow old and, yes, the bottoms

of my trousers are rolled

as I soak up the last of summer days

inclined to follow autumn’s ways

even as Apollo’s heat on me assumes

the contours of your body

against my bare skin and we are joined

as once we were, promising

to stay together forever, not knowing

life had other plans for us,

consumed by a summer’s history,

left to but blindly drift

the teasing shores of eternity

A sudden thrust of time and tide

demands an instant decision

(swim or drown?) Panic seizes me

in passion’s grip, my body

thrashing wildly like a lover in the heat

of an incredible lovemaking,

caught out confessing and climaxing

a bloody poetry of pain

no waves need wash clean, spoils

of ecstasy for all to see,

lovers finding rhythm enough to swim

the waters of eternity,

no matter who, or our sexuality

Swimming strongly now for the shore,

drawn by sounds of love and laughter

Copyright R. N. Taber 2010; 2017

[Note: This poem first appeared in On the Battlefields of Love by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2010; rev. ed. in e-format in preparation.]

Deliverance on a Wet Afternoon

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Sometimes even a wet afternoon can be inspirational. Besides when did the weather ever put itself out to accommodate the life and loves of us human beings?

Photo taken from the Internet

DELIVERANCE ON A WET AFTERNOON

Sat on a park bench in the pouring rain,

letting ripples on a pond run circles

in my mind, wondering if I had the energy

to pick myself up yet again from crises

life thrown at me like confetti at a groom

though barely room for love in a heart

forever running circles across the mind 

like ripples on a pond in rain soaking

my clothes (good camouflage for tears);

you sat by me and we began chatting

as if we had known each other for years, 

yet we were strangers, and your voice

eased the pain running circles in my mind

like that pond’s ripples in a pouring rain

that brought you to me and helped me feel

my way through to (finally) breaking free,
for there’s no pain we cannot rise above
if we but believe in ourselves, each other
and the healing power of love

As you listened and took my hand, I felt

my fears start to ease, sun breaking through

dark clouds where a rainbow shone for us

one lonely, lovely, rainy day acknowledging

I am gay, drying the tears on my face,

replacing them with, oh, so dazzling a smile
greeting yours, making it ours, reaching
an understanding that would know better
in future than to give ripples on a pond leave
to run circles in my mind

Copyright R. N. Taber 2010; 2018

[Note: An earlier version of this poem appears in On the Battlefields of Love by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2010 (without photo)