Reading Between the Lines

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Fort those readers who are less than happy about my carrying over some poems from my general poetry archives, here is a new one, written only a few days ago. I cannot expect everyone to like everything I write so feedback is really helpful. [Contact me any time at rogertab@aol.com with 'Poetry' in the subject field if you would like a reply or just leave a comment on the blog if you prefer to remain anonymous.]

Meanwhile...

Why is it so many people say one thing when they really mean another, often the complete opposite?A human trait throughout history, it is plainly one that political correctness encourages. It is so typical of many people when asked for a point of view that they try to suss out the questioner's standpoint first for fear of causing offence and/or being misunderstood and/or wrongly accused, and having to face consequences they do not deserve (or maybe they do...)

It would seem that honesty and free speech are among the first victims of any society whether supposedly democratic or otherwise. Yes, we need to care about each other, but not under false colours; in Romania, for example, LGBT communities have grown in recent years; it was named by Human Rights Watch as one of five countries in the world that have made "exemplary progress in combating rights abuses based on sexual orientation or gender identity. However, as we all know only too well, there can be no legislation for bad attitude.

I write this only hours after witnessing a so-called gay-friendly acquaintance I have known for years verbally abusing two young men for kissing in the street.I was walking on the other side, but could clearly see and hear the commotion opposite. When younger and fitter, I would have leapt to their defence, but the area is well-known for hate crime and the need for a walking stick in old age urges caution. Besides, the gay couple were clearly able to give as good as got even as they moved on from a small crowd that had started to gather, and was clearly not taking their side.

I went on my way, the sound of someone shouting, "Sickies, hell is too good for the likes of you!"

A phrase from Shakespeare's King Lear instantly sprung to mind, 'More sinned against than sinning.'

It will be interesting to hear what my longtime acquaintance has to say the next time we meet as I will not hold back from raising the subject...

READING BETWEEN THE LINES

There are many who will say

that being gay is a sin against humankind

and God

Humankind is judgemental

by nature, but does that fit in with a God

of Love?

There are many who will argue

that same sex relationships are unnatural

acts

According to whom, unnatural

as each to our own way of thinking, dogma

too?

There are many who (still) insist

it offends the eye to see two men or women

embrace

Oh, and why must any human eye

on embraces it finds offensive even go there

at all?

There is a majority who will agree

any words invoking LGBT images suggest ‘sick’

minds

Oh, and does a majority promote

healthy living in its rape of nature for capitalist

gratification?

There are few who support Equality

and Human Rights unconditionally, absolutely

no holds barred

Copyright R. N. Taber 2019

[Note: This post-poem also appears on my general poetry blog today.] RNT

Late Arrival on Cloud Nine

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

In mythology, Pygmalion was a sculptor who fell in love with a statue he had carved. Yes, well, we can do better than that...can't we?

Sometimes, it seems dreams can only ever be just...well, dreams... then love comes along and sees to it that life takes a turn for the better regardless of our colour, creed, sex, sexuality. Love, of course, takes many forms and lovers don't have a monopoly. Even so, the joys of being in love with someone who reciprocates can never be overstated.

Whatever, Carpe Diem, seize the day!

 LATE ARRIVAL ON CLOUD NINE 

I was gazing at the sky,

creating day-dreams out of clouds

so far, far, above,

friendly faces mouthing my secrets

telling the world I’m in love

and passing birds flapping wings

as if to approve,

reassuring me I have nothing at all

to prove to anyone

that I am any less of a man or person

for loving another,

yet as I looked away, sipped my tea,

I despaired of loving someone

so far, far, above me in every way,

has no idea I’m gay

In the shiny steel table top

I could still see the sky, day-dreams

determined to stay,

but a fingertip away, so near yet so far,

as you were to me

only an hour ago when we chatted

over a coffee, laughing

and joking about, well, no matter what

since just the sound

of your voice, the light in your eyes,

the turn of your smile

left me reaching for the sky, heart

like the wings of a bird,

beating, oh, so madly for trying to say,

I love you and I’m gay

I half rose and made to leave

my day-dreams behind, pay the bill,

get real…

when a distant roll of thunder took me

by surprise, and I sat down

just as it began to rain, and I had no mac,

wearing a tee shirt

and jeans since the day had started fine,

no reason to suspect

a storm, so I rose again to take shelter

in the café

when I felt a tap on my right shoulder,

turned to find you there,

an, oh, so queer expression on your face

as you moved in for a kiss

I’d had no idea you had guessed

my day-dreaming of our being lovers

all the time,

waiting for me to share the, come clean

about my feelings

instead of sculpting them with clouds

sharing with the birds,

winging to, oh, so far, far-away places,

where the only faces

I ever saw were yours, its shy smile

just like the one

you gave me just before you kissed me

in the pouring rain

and I kissed you back, no need to say

I love you and I’m gay

Copyright R. N. Taber 2016

Gutter Press, Working Mischief

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

This poem was written in 2002. 

Now, there was strict Equal Opportunities/Diversity policy where I used to work. Even so, a (straight) colleague once commented that he did not like to see two men kissing in the street or, indeed, anywhere in public.  I asked if he would object to kissing by way of a greeting or an impromptu gesture of affection? He insisted, 'Gay men have no right to impose their sexuality on others,' and went so far as to call it obscene for 'setting a bad example, especially to children and vulnerable young adults.' 

Photo: from the Internet

Yes, children and young people are naturally curious, and may well ask questions, but any suggestion that the sight of two men kissing is going to corrupt anyone has to be a complete nonsense. 

I asked my colleague how he felt about two women kissing in public. He replied that was different because 'women often do and one cannot assume they are lesbians'.  When I put it to him that his feelings about men kissing were therefore purely homophobic, he simply shrugged and walked away.

I have to admit I don't particularly care for couples - straight or gay - engaged in heavy kissing in public (especially if I happen to be sitting opposite them on a train or bus) but it's supposed to be a free country and I am, after all, free to sit elsewhere...or even close my eyes and surrender to some wishful thinking.

Let's face it, kissing is fun whether or not it may lead to that ultimate treasure trove called love, and I am pleased to say that most journalists I have ever met agree that, straight or gay, it makes no difference.

'With a kiss let us set out for that unknown world.' - Alfred de Musset

'We are all in the gutter, but some of us are reaching for the stars.' - Oscar Wilde

GUTTER PRESS, WORKING MISCHIEF

We kissed, quickening footsteps
rushing by like overflow
from a gutter… and heard voices
mutter,  ‘It’s not right to do that
in a busy street, would be different
if they were normal, for heaven’s
sake!  It’s a fine modernity permits
promiscuity in full view
of people going about their business,
anxious to cause no offence, 
setting an example to our kids, 
sure to keep a weather eye 
on their peers...getting paranoid
about tabloid whistle blowers,
wondering whose head next will fall,
Big Brother at school, on TV,
at the office, busy making mischief
while Heads, bosses, terrorists, 
are poised to mark our cards if only 
to make a point unless we, in turn, 
make a stand, prepare to deal ourselves 
a winning hand…’

‘So much to do, think about, without
having to look at gay folks kissing
in the street as if they had as much right
to be there as we everyday consumers
doing our damn best to rig share prices
and put the world straight.’

We kissed again, quickening footsteps
rushing past like overflow from a gutter,
and multicultural voices muttering …

Copyright R. N. Taber 2004; 2018

[Note: This poem has been slightly revised from the original version as it appears - under the title 'The Kiss' - in The Third Eye, by R. N.Taber, 2004.]

Street Kisses, and Why Not?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Heterosexual couples have kissed in public for years when meeting up or parting or even just on impulse (in the West, anyway) and no one bats an eyelid. Why should they be the only ones to enjoy the adrenaline rush?

Going public about romance…well, there’s no feeling like it! Let people mock, gossip or disparage gay couples kissing if they will. Most of them are just jealous because they have no one to kiss. 

Watching passers-by react to the sight of two gay men, obviously in love, kissing on a crowded street as they greeted one another once, was far more revealing about the darker side of human nature (and living in a multicultural society) than about the couple themselves. One telling comment I overheard was, 'Equality is all very well, but if you ask me, gays belong in the proverbial closet the way it use to be. Out of sight, out of mind...''

Yes, we have gay-friendly legislation in some parts of the world, but you can't legislate for bad attitude. July 27th 1967 homosexuality was decriminalised here in the UK. I have to say, it doesn't always feel like it...

This poem is a villanelle.

(Photo taken from the Internet)

STREET KISSES, AND WHY NOT?

Street kisses shared,

(far, far, sweeter than wine)

its home truths bared

Heart pounding, scared,

you lent your body to mine;

street kisses shared

For years we’d cared,

though the world draw a line

(its home truths bared)

Once we despaired,

most people quick to malign

street kisses shared

We hadn’t dared

give society the slightest sign

(its home truths bared)

Let them see we’re gay,

the love in our faces shine;

street kisses shared,

its home truths bared

Copyright R. N. Taber 2007; 2013

[Note: A slightly different version of this poem appears in 1st eds. of  Accomplices to Illusion by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2007; revised ed. in e-format in preparation.].

Love, Never Backward in Coming Forward

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

I will always be grateful to the guy (whose name I forget if I ever knew it for it was so long ago) who taught me the art of kissing.

Here in the UK, as in many western countries, heterosexual couples can kiss in public just about anywhere without being subjected to derogative comments or someone calling for their arrest. Not so, gay couples although it strikes me that it’s mostly gay men who bear the brunt of society’s discomfort regarding any public show of affection in this way.

[Photo taken from the Internet]

It is high time the less enlightened among the heterosexual majority got real and accepted that, like it or not, we gay people are here to stay.

As for leaders of those repressive regimes around the world (and their acolytes) where gay people live in fear of imprisonment or even death, why make complete fools of themselves in the eyes of the more enlightened when a demonstration of simple humanity could not only work wonders for world peace, but even make heroes of them instead?

Why shouldn't two gay men feel free to kiss and express love or affection or each other - yes, even in public - especially when they meet up or are saying goodbye? As for acting on impulse, I'm all for it. What's good for the heterosexual majority us good for the homosexual minority.  Any socio-cultural-religious intolerance of gay people can be summed up in two words - BAD ATTITUDE.

This poem is a villanelle.

LOVE, NEVER BACKWARD IN COMING FORWARD

Take me away from all this
prejudice and bigotry
with just one tender kiss

Well-meaning if thoughtless
people patronising me;
take me away from all this

Time to escape all this stress
if only briefly
with just one tender kiss

Politics but paying lip service
to our sexuality;
take me away from all this

Let religions ram its defences,
to our love, the victory
with just one tender kiss

Leaving those who despise us
to Earth Mother’s pity,
take me away from all this
with just one tender kiss

Copyright R. N. Taber 2008

Give me a Clue

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Here’s a very early (autobiographical) poem that I discovered a few years ago while clearing out my flat; I have slightly revised rather than rewrite. I was 17 years-old when I wrote the original version at a time when gay relationships were still a criminal offence here in the UK. In those days (as now) poetry was my lifeline, giving rein to pent-up feelings I could share with no one except others like me struggling to make sense of our sexuality. Some of us stayed the course; others, like Joey, caved into Mother Convention and the expectations of unsuspecting parents.

Joey is not his real name, but it is his birthday today.  He married a good 40 years ago and now has great-grandchildren. In the unlikely event he ever reads this post, he may remember me if I say he shared his name with the family cat (black, but for the tips of its ears that were white).

Oh, yes, I remember it well…

(Photo from the Internet)

GIVE ME A CLUE

Love was just a word

I’d heard people say, read about

in books, seen on TV

and movies in the middle row

at popcorn cinemas

Maggie is a lovely girl,

who lived just across the way

and asked me out,

but somehow I couldn’t see it, her
and me on a date 

Love was just a word,

kept drilling holes in my head,

burning my ears,

turning my skin red for tongues

ever wagging at me

Harry is a real nice guy

whom I’d known for years, 

(though not really well)
invariably making the queerest

impression on me 

Love was a just a word

making itself felt all the more

for wondering about Joey

and what he was doing, wishing

we could get together

I really didn’t have a clue

what life was meant to be about

(for me, at any rate)

till Joey sat next to me on a bus,

let his smile say it all

Love was just a word

I’d heard people say, read about,

seen on TV, in cinemas...

till we shared a kiss, Harry and me,

and it (finally) got real

Copyright R. N. Taber 1963; 2012

O-U-T

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

There is a closet some people choose or are forced to live in. The longer we stay in that cold, dark place, the stranger it can feel at first when we find the courage (and growing self-confidence) to come out into the open.  Any sense of self-consciousness, though,  is quickly overtaken by a quiet pride, growing self-confidence and inner euphoria.

Regular readers will know I believe very strongly that the decision to be openly gay is a matter of personal choice. Sadly, some gay people live under repressive regimes and don’t have that choice. Others chose not to rock the family boat for various socio-cultural-religious reasons. However, make no mistake, coming out sets an example from which other closet gay boys and girls, men and women, can take heart, and hopefully find the inner strength to follow.

I had spent many years as a tormented youth and young man in the closet during the 1960s and early-mid 1970s before I finally emerged into daylight never to return.  It took a severe nervous breakdown to make me see I needed to be honest with myself and others if I were to get a life really worth having. A gay friend to whom I looked up, and whose self-confidence I envied, reassured me there is no stigma attached to being gay, whatever anyone from any country or culture may insist; nor is it unnatural, but the way we are born. Those who try to impose stigma upon us are twisted bigots, nothing more or less, and we should be glad we are better than that. The least we can do, my friend said, is attempt to educate the ignorant and less enlightened among the heterosexual majority about gay issues; as much for the sake of future generations of gay people, their families and friends as for ourselves.

My friend’s words are an inspiration to me even now, years on.

You can laugh, but I was further inspired by that lovely song Secret Love first sung by the legendary Doris Day in the musical Calamity Jane, and no better version since; it is a love song, and no way a gay love song in the context of the film, yet it gave me food for thought and helped me realise that, gay or straight, love could not care less. I have adored Doris Day ever since. 

It is a savage indictment on the 21^st century that there is still of LOT of educating to do about what it means to be gay. Only the other day, I saw some young people taunting two men holding hands as they walked down a London street with homophobic abuse. Yes, London UK, that place where many gay people claim ‘gays have never had it so good.’ That may well be true, but it plainly is not good enough.

O-U-T

Once I’d told the world I’m gay,

I felt as though everyone could see

right through me

Once I’d told the world I’m gay,

I felt a growing affinity with my pc

everyone tapping into me

Once I’d told the world I’m gay,

I sensed everyone taking a good look

over this newspaper, that book

Once I’d told the world I’m gay,

I started haunting gay clubs and bars

like an alien from Mars

Once I’d told the world I’m gay,

I’d imagine every guy on every street

on his back and up for it

Once I’d told the world I’m gay,

I used to wonder if it would ever be

comfortable with my sexuality

Once I’d told the world I’m gay,

it all but cajoled me to give sex a miss

till I shared my first gay kiss

Copyright R. N. Taber 1989; 2010

Born Again OR Mind-Body-Spirit, Second Time Around

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Being in denial is the worst kind of self-torture if only because our alter-ego is well aware of what is happening and does not let up its torrent of accusation and recriminatory taunts; turning a deaf inner ear may win us a few battles, but we’ll not win the war and peace of mind doesn’t stand a chance ...

The human spirit is stronger than that; as life forces go, it has to be first among equals, and only a heartbeat away.

(Photo taken from the Internet)

BORN AGAIN or MIND-BODY-SPIRIT, SECOND TIME AROUND

You had an angel’s smile,

white shirt flapping like wings

in a breeze;

out of nowhere, you came,

coaxing this lonely Unbeliever

to his knees

You took me in your arms

kissed me, your lips fanning ashes

all but spent;

my long-smouldering body

burst into flames of mad desire

as was meant

A passion raging in the soul,

far more than sexual, rose like a ghost

set free...

into the kind of heaven

sure to offer unconditional

sanctuary

You named and shamed me

out of a self-denial keeping me
in its hell;

Oh, ecstasy, born again
in you, you in me, to love,
the victory

Copyright R. N. Taber 1973; 2012; 2015

[Note: An earlier version of this poem appears under the title 'Kiss of Life' in First Person Plural by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2002.

The Kiss

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

Readers often ask for the link to my poetry reading on the 4th plinth in London's Trafalgar Square in 2009 by way of being my contribution to sculptur Anrony Gormley's One and Other 'live sculpture' project during which ordinary people from all walks of life and parts of the UK did their 'own thing' for one hour 24/7 over 100 days:

http://www.webarchive.org.uk/wayback/archive/20100223121732/oneandother.co.uk/participants/Roger_T  [NB: Sept 19, 2019 - The British Library confirmed today that he video is no longer available as it was incompatible with a new IT system, However, it still exists and BL hope to reinstate it and make it available to the public again at some future date.] RNT

Now, I have always enjoyed kissing. When readers contact me to ask why I have written several poems about kissing...well, that’s why. When I am kissing another man, I spread wings and the entire subsequent sexual experience develops not only as a sensual but also a spiritual one. Mind you, it needs the right man and he needs to feel the same about me. It doesn’t even have to be love. Love is a bonus. Mutual attraction can be spark enough to ignite the fires of passion. [Not that I get much of that these days except when I am writing a gay-interest poem!]

Oh, yes, I love all sexual foreplay, including kissing, and have never been interested in the sex act for its own sake. It may work for some people, but not for me. Ah, but don’t get me wrong. I’m not being judgemental. Whatever works for you, go for it, that’s what I say.

THE KISS

One kiss, I place above all others,
conveying the passion of a midsummer night,
bringing to the heart of my darkness
all the comfort and joy of an armchair firelight,
letting my natural sexuality go free,
drop all pretence of pandering to conventions
bent on persecuting me

One kiss, I place above all others,
urging me not to feel ashamed but come out
fighting (win or lose) if I must ...
not for my sake, but a centuries-old birthright
to wear Earth Mother’s colours
with pride instead of pandering to conventions
nailing bars at my windows

One kiss, I place above all others,
treading, oh, so gently on the sweetest dreams,
flooding my body with the heat
of an insatiable spirituality tearing at its seams,
anxious to wear its colours
with pride instead of pandering to conventions
mapping out the world’s scars

One kiss I place above all others
brought me to my knees as you lay me down
in the cradle of history
that has cherished the same christening gown
handed down across centuries
by those choosing not to pander to conventions,
be taken for freaks, put in cages

It’s a gay kiss I place above all others, my first,
that I’ve since nurtured, seen grow, and let last

Copyright R. N. Taber 2009

[From: Tracking The Torchbearer by R N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2012.]

Kiss And Tell

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/R._N._Taber

This poem has already appeared on the blog twice; the last time was in July 2010. However, so many readers have asked me to post it again that LGBT History Month here in the UK seems as good a time as any. It is posted again today especially for ‘Marc and Tony’ - ‘Steve and Ron’ - ‘Samir and Hassam’ - ‘Axel and Kristian’ - ‘Inez and Ingrid’ + ‘Alice amd Siobahn’; also for a teacher, Mick, who says, ‘[I] wholeheartedly support the idea of LGBT issues being discussed in schools instead of being avoided as if being gay, lesbian or transgender was still some kind of taboo.’

Photo taken from the internet

Gay couples, like couples the world over, don't deserve to be mocked or scorned for a simple  public show of affection. Yet, even in this 21st century of ours, we continue to be mocked and/or scorned the world over...not only in closed societies either; homophobia remains alive and kicking in the western world too. Socio-cultural-religious arguments against such simple public shows of affection - by couples of either sex. sexuality are an anachronism; bigotry by any other name...

KISS AND TELL

Your first kiss stripped my conscience bare
and reconstructed it, layer by finer layer

Your next kiss peeled away guilt of a Youth
that never quite came to terms with truth

More kisses instilled in me a peace of mind
my heart often warned I might never find

Other kisses showed me a brave new world
then took me there, its humanity revealed

Your mouth, it lit in me a bonfire of passion
reducing life’s agony to a smouldering ruin

Your kisses flood me with beautiful dreams
where nightmares once tore at life’s seams

Each kiss leaves my heart soaring like a dove;
where it sang the Blues, now it sings of love

Your kisses taste like rose-hip on my tongue,
our bodies, like petals, in spring’s arms flung

No kiss leaves me but yearning for another;
no matter the bigotry, we have each other

Your mouth teaches me even more each day
how to live and love, unashamed to be gay

Copyright R. N. Taber 2008

[From: Tracking the Torchbearer by R. N. Taber, Assembly Books, 2012]